How To Enjoy Your Body On Vacation (Even In Shorts!)

I had the immense pleasure of going to the Caribbean with my family last week.

I was genuinely grateful I could take a break from New England winter. However, it wasn't always a week I looked forward to—for as long as I can remember, the anxiety of dressing a body I hated always reared its head before and during the trip, followed by frustration and anger upon my return that I had spent most of the vacation focused on my body and my diet.

Can you relate to this?

I've heard stories of people not going into the water because they didn't want people to see them in a bathing suit or shorts (OK, that was me). Friends have told me about spending vacation feeling disgusted because they saw themselves in pictures wearing the aforementioned bathing suit and shorts. I know someone who desperately wants to travel but is too afraid to take a passport photo because she thinks she looks fat.

What the actual heck is going on?

It’s incredible how much we let body dissatisfaction rule our life and prevent us from exploring and having fun (or ruin it once we see a picture of us in the throes of it). I get it honestly. I was there for SO many years. I used to make sure I went to therapy on the day I packed for vacation just so I could motivate myself to select my clothes with as few tears as possible. I sweated in sweltering destinations in pants because heaven forbid I show my thighs to people who don’t give a fuck how I look and who will never see me again.  I told myself that I would stick to the strict diet that I followed at home, and when I had chocolate on the plane ride to my destination I beat myself over how weak I was.

I wish I could take all those moments back and trade them in for fonder memories. However, the body appreciation work I've done has led me to body freedom on vacation: walking around in shorts and bathing suits (cellulite and all, baby!), intuitively eating what feels good, and making sure I'm maxing out on the fun. If you're not there yet, that is ABSOLUTELY OK...the goal is to not make your body so much of a focus" and get in the way of your enjoyment.

So let's talk about a few ways to enjoy your body on vacation:

1. Understand you're not alone. Do you think you're the only one that is having body shame on vacation? When scanning the pool deck, I could tell that everyone was a bit self-conscious of their bodies in some way — even the men. Remember that no one is immune. Truthfully, everyone is so consumed with their own insecurities and hoping you're not looking at them that they are most definitely not looking at you.

2. Zoom out: We are always so concerned with ourselves and the way we look that often we forget to take a wide lens view and see that bodies come in all shapes and sizes. When people have bathing suits on, you can see what's typically hidden under clothes. Bodies with scars, birthmarks, cellulite, stretch marks—EVERYONE has them. Even those who have desirable bodies in clothes. Bodies are perfectly and beautifully imperfect.

3. Shop for comfort and confidence: If certain items are scary for you (like swimwear and shorts), then find some that you LOVE and feel helluva cute in. Before my trip, I purchased some awesome swimsuits and cover-ups from Torrid and Amazon. Each time I put them on, I felt great—I finally ditched my maternity bathing suit from 7 years ago and got some suits that fit and accented my curves. It made all the difference.

4. What are you gaining? Think of what you will gain on your vacation by not being brought down by bad body thoughts. Perhaps if you wear shorts in hot weather, you will be more relaxed and more comfortable. Maybe by wearing a bathing suit, you can go swimming with your kids or have the pleasure of wading into the ocean. Perhaps you'll have the realization of "Fuck this! Life is too short" and practice putting body insecurities to the side for a few days.

5. Practice. I didn't go from wearing pants one moment to shorts the next. Heck no, this stuff takes time. It starts with purchasing a pair of shorts. Then maybe wearing them around the house, getting used to finally having your legs, not in a dress. The next step is wearing them on a quick errand and back, building up to a full day. Or, you could be an all-or-nothing person and just go for it. If that's your style, rock on!

You are a beautiful being who deserves to have a fantastic vacation. Your body also deserves to be comfortable AND not to be held back from joyful experiences. So the next time someone suggests a warm-weather locale for your next vacation, take a deep breath. Say yes. And have fun.